Sunday, August 31, 2008

I don't have time for this... or do I?

Like most other little boys, my little boy has a plethora of goofing off type behaviors which he generally engages in when I am most in need of cooperation. It often sets me off and I get more and more stressed out.

Recently we made some changes which put Pablo in charge of some of his own time wasting. For example, at bedtime, he knows what he needs to do, and if he wastes his time, we don't get to read as much. Or at all. But bedtime stays the same. We no longer nag. We just wait while making intermittent comments like, "Gee, I sure will be disappointed if we miss Stuart Little tonight!" I mean, it is awesome. We have gone from stressed out nagging to snide comments. Truly a great parental opportunity.

Like a Pavlovian pooch, I saw today how I still react in a stressed out manner when he starts goofing off even when there is no reason to. We had nowhere to go, no one to see, but when he started seriously goofing around, I found myself getting more and more tense and reacting in a way I don't like.

Then I took a breath and asked myself, "Do I have time for this?" I did.

So I relaxed and worked toward unhooking my connection between his goofing off and my stress level. Then I did it again and again and again. Apparently this is going to take a while....


  1. Habits are hard to break, but just noticing does the trick.

  2. These things often do, but remember to relax mindfully into the moment DOES make a huge difference for all concerned. Thanks for the reminder …
    Hugs and blessings,

    Hmmm ... something strange going on here. I entered "visual verification" the first time ... can't see any letters to enter now. Sigh! Maybe if I 'preview' they'll show up again?

    Yep ... they did. Now ... will Blogger accept the comment this time? We'll see ;--)