Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Scheduled Outrage

I was going to blog about something else, but when I opened the page, there was a caption at the top of my Blogger screen: "Scheduled outrage at 4:00 PM PDT." Well, how very useful! Scheduling your outrage is a great way to make sure you are at peak efficiency. I mean, being outraged in general really drains the energy, you know? I wonder what we are supposed to be outraged about. Is this outrage to be focused on politics? The environment? The treatment of children? Cruelty to animals? I find myself kind of concerned in advance about my time of outrage. Also, how long is my outrage supposed to last? Is this like a moment of silence thing, or more ongoing? I don't think it is healthy to STAY outraged for a very long time. You just can't sustain it. I think I will go for a 5 minute outrage. That sounds like enough time to show I care, but not really enough to ruin the rest of my day. Yep, 5 minutes. That will do me. I think I also need a topic... hmmm... maybe gas prices! Yes! No... everyone will be doing that one. I need something kind of unique, but still clearly something to be outraged about. Bush won't do.... I am kind of stumped. Ooh! How about disposable things? Like the fact that the production of water bottles takes about 3 times the amount of water that they contain? And the fact that people generally don't understand that throwing away free things is still THROWING THEM AWAY. Like getting a huge amount of napkins at a fast food restaurant! Man, that really gets on my nerves.

No, wait, it's not time yet. I was starting to get outraged early. Sorry about that.

oh.

It says "Scheduled OUTAGE at 4:00 PM PDT."

Nevermind.

2 comments:

  1. I am literally crying right now, I laughed so hard while reading your post. Mainly because I get e-mails at work about scheduled outages all the time, and I misread them, in the same way your post describes, every time! I do admire that you were so ready to comply with the instructions - planning ahead and everything! I am, however, glad that you did not have to go through with the outrage. I prefer my friend to be happy.

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  2. I love the misreading of the Blogger notice … and it was a longer outage than usual so I suspect there could have been outrage among bloggers. I ended up with odd problems with comments disappearing … on BOTH of my blogs and only noticed because I get email notifications. Strange stuph going on …

    I must add that I thoroughly enjoyed your ‘rant’ ;--)
    Hugs and blessings,

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