I fell off the map.

At least it felt like it. We had some bad days, then some better ones. I am back on my existential crisis, feeling like I have no friends who get me (or get my son, or get the package that is my family), blah blah blah. Even I am sick of it. So I read my partner's Oprah. I have a really hard time with finding wisdom in a magazine that sells lipstick.

That's not true.

I have a hard time ADMITTING that I find wisdom in a magazine that sells lipstick. But Oprah manages it monthly. For those who can't afford therapy, just go read the most therapy-ish article in there (hint: it is NEVER EVER Dr. Phil. That guy is a nutbag for sure. I can't imagine that he keeps his license. Don't get me started on his stance toward children and parenting. Vile.) and it will get you through the month.

This month it is Just What You Need by Martha Beck. All about abundance mentality.

Sigh.

I am all too aware of my scarcity mentality with regards to money, friends, community, and even in my faith in the universe. To me there is never enough. So I have been working HARD to believe that I have all I need, and that all I need comes to me. I am trying my best to feel content with what I have, love my life as it is, see the good in what I have, and let changes happen as they come rather than chafing at the bit, constantly wanting more, more, more.

This being content thing takes a lot of work. Am I not doing it right?