Father's Day is coming...

I went to Target with a friend. While there, we looked for Father's Day cards for her (putz of a) dad, and I stumbled on an idea for a whole unexplored genre of cards! Where are the cards for lousy dads? The ones that say things like:

Thanks for getting mom knocked up!
Too bad you didn't stick around to see what I was like out of the womb.
Happy "Father's" Day!

Or:

Dad, you taught me the most important lessons of all.
Don't cheat, steal, or lie.
Too bad you didn't practice what you preach!
Happy "Father's" Day!

You get my drift. Don't you think there's a whole cadre of passive aggressive angry adult children of crappy dads who would pay big money to lay a guilt trip on their old pop on his big day? I have hit on a million dollar industry, I am sure.

And for the good dads, the ones we really want to appreciate, can there be some cards that don't require dad to be obsessed with golfing, fixing things badly, or drinking? Some that are funny (ie not about farting or fishing) but kind and loving. And funny. Did I mention funny? "Pull my finger" is not funny, people. Except to my son.